Forgiven
by Claire Farron
Summary: Moving on from your first love is like trying to pretend they never existed...it just can't be done. *END GAME SPOILERS/POST GAME* Fang/Lightning  past  Cid/Lightning


**Title:** Forgiven  
**Chapters:** 01||?  
**Author:** lj user="itzzerogravity"

**Genre:** Angst, Romance, Smut  
**Ratings:** NC-17  
**Pairings/Characters:** Fang/Lightning (past) Cid/Lightning

**Synopsis:** _Trying to move on from your first love is like forcing yourself to erase a piece of your heart it can't be done. _  
**Comments:** [ I do not own Fang or Lightning they all belong to Square Enix I am not making any money off of this and it's for entertainment purposes only. I am not good at explaining summaries you will just have to read it to understand it, Somehow Cid surived because I needed someone to pair with Lightning. So enjoy it!

_"F-Fang we can't….not here…not now…not like this…" The solider spoke out between labored breaths as the Pulsian woman's fingers found their way between her legs stroking over her most sensitive areas. "Mmm…why can't we Light?" She asked simply while her other hand lightly played with Lightning's breasts. It was a chilly night in Sulyya Springs and while the others were out gathering food or making sure there were no feral creatures lurking around Fang and Lightning had decided to stay back and keep watch over the camp; though when Lightning went off to bathe leaving Fang in control she was interrupted by a pair of arms wrapping around her waist from behind the next thing she knew they were on the ground kissing with Lightning completely bare and Fang laying between her legs bringing her to the point of bliss._

___She could feel it her stomach tightening up and the tingling sensation between her legs, she slid her finger into her mouth holding back any noises that wanted to break free from her lips as her back arched in a perfect bow as released crashed down on her like a tidal wave causing her entire body to tense up and her muscles to contract around Fang's fingers. _

___Her eyes opened slowly to the sound of people running around upstairs and the screaming of kids outside, since they had all relocated to Oerba and were in the process of restoring it to its former glory things had been a little hectic on the poor solider. "Claire wake up!" Serah spoke in an excited tone from downstairs the former solider let out a soft sigh and sat up running her fingers through her mused messy hair and stood up walking to the window, hardly anyone ever saw her like this in only a t-shirt and some short shorts. Lightning could see the crystallized form of Cocoon in the distance and it almost made her heart ache knowing that the woman she loved would never wake up again. _

___Lightning never admitted her feelings for Fang though she had an idea the woman knew sometimes their hands would intentionally brush up against each other just for the shock of pleasure and the feeling of knowing you had someone there when you needed them, the nights they would spend miles away from camp just so they could indulge in each other, now all that was left were painful memories and hopes that one day she might get to see Fang again. If Serah and Dajh came back then that meant that Fang and Vanille would be back too right? They woke up once maybe they would wake up again, though it seemed so farfetched for Lightning to wish for something like that. _

___The very moment they destroyed orphan and the moment she saw Fang and Vanille below her she knew nothing good would come of it, when she woke up from crystal stasis and saw her home she could feel her heart being ripped out of her chest and stomped on, though she knew it would happen somewhere deep inside herself she wished that this wouldn't have to happen and that maybe she could fix their fates and Fang wouldn't have to do this but of course she was wrong and she lost the one woman the only woman she thought she could ever love. _

___She rested her hand over her heart and looked out at Cocoon as a soft sigh left her lips before that normal emotionless stare took over and she grabbed a towel and her clothes she was going to wear for that day and headed down to the showers; for some reason the water felt so much more fresh and cooler than it did on Cocoon, though it wasn't as warm as she liked it got her clean and that was all that mattered. She sighed out softly and cupped her breasts in her hands tilting her head back against the wall as the water soaked her entire body it felt so soothing and she was enjoying this alone time because the next time she would get it was probably when she went to bed. If she closed her eyes and drifted off into her memories it was almost as if Fang was the one doing this to her and not her; her other hand slid lower between her legs toying with the sensitive pearl that sent waves of pleasure down her spine causing her back to arch off the wall while she pushed two fingers insider her warm depths "F-Fang…" She spoke under her breath and tilted her head back it never took her long if she just thought that this was Fang doing this, her fingers toyed with her nipple quickly. _

___A few minutes later she walked out of the shower area slightly flushed but completely dressed in her solider uniform, making sure no one saw or heard her she pulled her gloves on and placed her weapon in the holster behind her. "So Light what is on the agenda for today?" Snow asked leaning against one of the buildings with his arms wrapped around Serah's waist firmly, she crossed her arms over her chest and shrugged her shoulders as she tried to think what they were going to do that day "The normal things Snow just start working on Oerba while I check the surrounding areas for any signs of danger I'm taking Sazh and Hope with me though so please don't let this place fall apart while I am away alright?" She pleaded though she was trying to sound firm since the fall of Cocoon it was getting harder and harder to remain stoic like she was back then. _

___She motioned for Sazh and Hope to go off and look at a different area and to meet her back at this spot in three hours, once they were out of sight she made her way to an old way stone, she reached out to touch it but pulled her hand back biting down on her lip she shook her fears away and touched the stone watching it light up a faint glow and teleport her to the base of the now crystallized Cocoon. "Can you hear me up there?" Lightning asked under her breath as she looked up at the pillars knowing there was no way she was going to be able to get back into Cocoon to see even Fang's crystallized form, it almost broke her heart all over again and lately it was getting harder and harder to hide. _

___Lightning turned away from the formation and looked out at the great expanse that was the Gran Pulse, a soft smile found its way on her lips as she saw the animals running around freely yes there were some of the most vicious and most awful looking animals out there but when it came down to it weren't they all the same fighting for survival. Even the Chocobos were running around and every once in awhile she could catch a glimpse of one or lounge by the river side in _Vallis Media, time alone is what she always said she needed but everyone knew she was hurting even Sazh's pet chocobo he could tell how upset she got when someone mentioned Fang though they were quick to shut their mouth the damage was always done so easily and it was so hard to repair it.

When she sat down and thought about it there were so many things she could be thankful for the fact that Serah was back was a huge thing that made her happy and that she had not been assigned to any missions which gave her time to make up for always being gone when they lived on Cocoon, but deep down not even Serah could fill the void that Fang left and Vanille that cheerful girl was like a little sister to her even though she was 500 years older than Lightning she still had that cute childish demeanor that made Lightning see some of Serah in her.

Soft footsteps against the dirt brought her out of her thoughts; she turned around quickly and grabbed her blazefire saber from the holster behind her but when she saw who it was it almost made her heart jump into her throat. "How the hell…what are you doing here…how did you survive?" She spoke her tone held the iciness to it but at the same time it held anger and fear to it. The man smiled and held out his hands toward the solider in defense. "Now now Sergeant Farron no need to overreact…"


End file.
